Anxiety In Kids and Teens Part 2

In this second segment of Anxiety In Kids and Teens podcast, Dr. Terri Daniels and I discuss some ways to help kids and teens deal with anxiety. Watch Part 1 here.

[NOTE: We are not doctors, psychologists, or psychiatrists. We are not giving medical advice. This podcast is for informational purposes and is based on personal experience. Please consult a medical professional for medical advice regarding anxiety.]

Regulate

[1:55] How can parents help their kids and teens with anxiety? We can start by talking about anxiety as a normal emotion. We can encourage our kids as they are dealing with very strong emotions, such as anxiety. Normalizing emotions will help them regulate the very strong emotions they have at this stage of development.

Setting Up Boundaries

[3:19] Another way to help our kids and teens manage anxiety is to set boundaries. Boundaries will look different from family to family, but one boundary that is important is monitoring smartphone and social media use. A lot of anxiety can be diminished when access to their phones and social media is limited. 

Monitoring smartphones and social media use can be limiting the amount of time kids and teens are allowed on their phones and social media. It can be only having access in communal spaces in the home and keeping the devices out of bedrooms at night. Not only does this keep anxiety inducing stress at a minimum, but it gives kids and teens the ability to get the sleep they need.

Kids and teens may push back on the boundaries parents create. However, setting up boundaries is another way to help kids and teens learn to regulate their emotions, especially anxiety.

It’s Not Osmosis

[7:00] Kids and teens don’t learn to manage anxiety or set boundaries through osmosis. Managing emotions and creating boundaries are things that are learned. Parents must teach and model managing anxiety and creating healthy boundaries. These are skills that take work and practice to develop. 

In our instant gratification culture, kids and teens don’t realize that they need to work to learn new skills. They often think that if they don’t get something right away they will never get it, so they give up too early. Parents modeling for their kids and teens can really help them learn to stick it out.

Just Be

[9:15] We are human beings, not human doings. We are made up of more than just what we do, but we still try to cram our lives full of doing, doing, doing. 

The same goes for kids and teens. Parents model being busy and our kids and teens are learning to be busy people too. Being too busy with school and extra-curricular activities can create a lot of anxiety in our kids and teens. Sometimes having space for solitude and to just be is the best remedy for anxiety.

Again, learning to just be and have solitude is something that needs to be practiced. The next time we find ourselves waiting at the doctor’s office or sitting in a restaurant, instead of pulling out our phones, just be. Sit and talk with the people we are with or look around the room, especially if we are with our kids and teens. Let them see us practice just being. 

Let’s Recap

[13:15] Anxiety is a normal emotion. Regulating it is something that takes time and practice. Having boundaries can greatly reduce anxiety. Parents can model regulating anxiety, setting boundaries, and we can be an invaluable support to our kids and teens. Take time to slow down and just be, as individuals and as families.